Oh The Shame!
This is a post that has been long coming. I have been sitting at home debating at whether to write it or not, it’s so embarrassing. That’s why I haven’t posted for a while. I was at a loss at what to do. But now I think, what the heck, you as my honest and faithful readers deserve to know.
You see, I was looking over my blog posts just recently and I am really amazed at the amount of knowledge I have about healthy eating and losing weight. I mean, it looks like I know pretty much all you need to know in order to make a real difference in your health and weight. I know about what to eat and when to eat; I know about certain types of food and what effect they have on the body; I know about the importance of water in your diet; know about binge eating and what role the emotions can play when you try to lose weight. I have written about different methods you can use to slowly lose those pounds. I actually think I know pretty much all the tips and tricks when it comes to effectively and healthily losing weight.
So why, WHY is it that I can not achieve what I so desperately want and what I seem to know so much about???? Am I playing a stupid trick on myself?? Even worse, whilst sharing all these great blog posts with you, my readers, and whilst knowing that it all works, I have actually GAINED ANOTHER 3kg!! I have honestly NEVER been that big. Never.
Now, I don’t want you to get me wrong here. What I am writing about is really good stuff and very valuable when it comes to losing weight. I am very serious about the matter, and I would never pass on any wrong advice. I just feel so ashamed after writing about all this and then going on to gain weight. It all comes down to the fact that I have not been able to pull through with any of the suggestions I made so far. I have been able to change some of my eating habits for a day or two, but that was about it. Sure, I saw changes whenever I managed to stick to something for a day or so, but my emotions always got the better of me, and in the end I always sit there at night, after the kids are in bed, and “reward” myself with different treats (usually high carb… 
).
Yes, I am a full blown emotional eater, and I am not coping with my emotions too well right now. Like I have suggested in several posts and comments on my blog here, when dealing with emotional overeating you should go and see a psychologist or get counseling to talk about it. That’s what I have been doing for the past year and a half, and we have made good progress, but sometimes there comes a “crash and burn” period and I seem to be going through it right now. I hope I will rise out of the ashes to achieve bigger and better results!
So there you have it. Now you know – I am just like everybody else. Got my baggage to carry, my own demons to fight. I have been successful in the past with losing weight, and I plan to be successful again – for good. I will keep researching for healthy and simple ways to lose weight, and I will keep sharing them here.
At the same time I would love to hear from you all if you have tried any of the suggestions I make here on the blog, and if you have been able to stick to them for a while, what kind of results you got. Please 
?
I hope you are still with me, and if you are I will let you know what happens in the future! 
Please don’t beat yourself up. It is so much easier to give advice than it is to do it ourselves. I could tell you all day long about the benefits of exercise and eating right…as I sit here with my bowl of ice cream with peanut butter cups in it. I am an emotional eater, and I am emotional right now (and apparently for the past 2 months)…I love your blog, you provide great information. Don’t beat yourself up, that is the worst thing you can do.
Cassy´s last [type] ..Sexy Pirate Costumes
Try not to beat yourself up. I know everybody says that, but we all know by now that guilt only adds to the problem. I have a main site about meditation and affirmations and positive thinking. The last few weeks I have not been a poster child for what I preach and I commend you for your honesty. As they say in twelve step programs and other places, that’s the first step.
gwenrule62@costumes baby´s last [type] ..Princess Slippers
I am kinda new here, and read many of your articles, and in one of the articles someone commented a way to relax and tried it, worked for me or it was my mind playing the trick with me
but as others told also, do not beat yourself up, and as long as you have the time and wish, continue to write your articles, enlight us 
Selin @ Weight Loss´s last [type] ..Safe snacks
what worked and still works for me are fruits, 1 hour riding my bike or running and a lot of tea (mint especially now in summertime)
I agree
Tea is really great and of course physical activity
alex@Giochi Divertenti´s last [type] ..Crazy Mammoths
It is great to know that all on-line writers are actually ‘human’ and not some ultimate health freak, but a mere mortal like us. I myself am a emotional eater, but at my times of need, I have two emergency items. One a picture, of someone I emulate to be, in this case a movie star’s figure and the other item is Weight Watchers bars. These bars are around 129 calories but they fill you up enough, so try them, they are called ‘Rich Toffee Bars’ I thin.
lipo´s last [type] ..Liposuction
I strongly agree with them, never beat yourself up! You are a great adviser and I know that you are a good person. It doesn’t matter whether you lose or gain weight. We are happy that you are there to help us live our life healthier and longer. Like them, I am also thankful that you made a very helpful and informative blog. I love reading blogs that talk about health/wellness. Please continue what you have just started. I believe that your planning of losing weight “again” will be successful. God bless.
I really feel pity on myself as I am just 55kgs although my height is 6’3″ and in-spite of trying so much to gain weight, I can’t make it up to even 60kgs.
I wish i could have that 3 kgs of weight gain. Anyways nice post. LoL
Don’t be discouraged! There are a lot of people who “cracked” one time or two or even more during their diet! Try be calm, try some meditations and your motivation will come back.
All this means is that you are human like everyone else. It is not uncommon for fitness professionals and personal trainers to sometimes put on a little weight themselves. Remember that by sharing your expertise here you are doing a great service to others and helping people to lose weight. Be proud of that, let that lift your spirits.
Running a website such as this takes a lot of time and effort. Maybe you just need to readjust your daily routine to help yourself get in shape. How do you start your day? Maybe you check the weblogs and accounts first thing to see how things are? Instead, do your exercise, have your healthy breakfast, then get to work. As for the binge eating and emotional eating, you know what to do about that too!
Jon@lose weight in a month´s last [type] ..How To Lose Weight in One Month
Jon, you are right about adjusting my daily routine, I talked about that with my counsellor as well. I need a bit more structure in my days to help me focus and get things done. Thanks for your support and suggestions!
Jon, good advice! I have been thinking about changing my work routines in order to be less stressed. Thank you!
title explain more then any paragraph, but its great info. most interesting para is
So why, WHY is it that I can not achieve what I so desperately want and what I seem to know so much about????
nice cheers , i have subscribed your feeds
It might take a week or two before you notice any changes, but they will steadily appear. Just stay firm on your point that you want top lose weight. Atleast those 3kgs which you gained.
You are very brave to have published these details about your weight, especially as you are trying to teach people about weight loss. Most people would have just lied and carried on regardless. So for your honesty I congratulate yourself.
It may also work in your favor as hopefully you will lose that weight and explain to people how you managed it despite your cravings/emotional issues etc. That in turn could be of enormous benefit to people.
Good luck and stick at it. It looks like you have plenty of support too.
Peter
Hey Petra-
don’t sweat it girl. When I was pregnant with my third child, I was having a real struggle losing weight after my first two, and I decided it was time to make a decision in my life, I was going to either get fat and e fat for the rest of my life, or I as going to learn how to eat right and eat that way for the rest of my life….
Well that’s what I did. I started to learn and study all I could about not just weight loss, but eating healthy to maintain a healthy weight once I lost it.
Then I became really strict on what I eat. First I was strictly low-carb. I went clear off sugar, flour, and the four no-no’s : Corn, Potatoes, rice and noodles. Those were things I did not allow in my meals.
Now that I have had 5 children, and the weight has gone up and down, I have been able to take the weight off within 3 months after each baby. One thing that was hard was the first year of being so strict. No candy or sugar goodies was tough and I had horrible cravings, but since then it has become easier and easier.
The link above next to my name is to the cookbook I still use to cook for myself, because the recipes are all low calorie and low carb and delicious. My sister is the author of the above ebook. I am her webmaster and help her edit her newsletters and blog at: http://mygourmethome.com.
Stick to it, get strict with yourself for the first year and it gets easier. I also switched to sweetening everything with blue agave syrup. There’s the debate of whether it’s worse for you than high fructose corn syrup, but having use it daily for over two years I can say it has helped me to maintain a healthy 125-135/pounds weight range and still have sweet treats. I bake and cook with it as well as use it to sweeten my coffee and I love it!
Hope this helps! Don’t give up, it’s not about dieting, it’s about a lifestyle change – changing the way you eat. You can do it! Good luck, and feel free to leave your comments and questions on my lens!
Jen @ HCG Diet Gourmet Cookbook´s last [type] ..HCG Gourmet Recipes Cookbook updated Fri Aug 13 2010 9-26 am CDT
Jen, thank you so much for leaving a great comment here, and giving me and my readers such great encouragement and advice. I take my hat off you for being able to keep up your strict regime regarding your food – that is the hardest part. Congratulations on achieving your weight loss goals, and on having 5 children
! I will have to check out your and your sisters blog, and your lens. And I have never heard of blue agave syrup before. I wonder whether they have it here in Australia… Thanks again, and good luck to you!
Please don’t be hard on yourself, there are many things that can cause weight gain like stress. I think your blog is great and i have to lose about 80lbs. I am also an emotional eater but one thing i did to help solve this problem was clean out all my cabinets of all junk food or any food that is bad for me. Then restock it with fresh fruit. That way if i need to eat i eat a banana or grapes.
If i dont have the food in the house i cant eat the junk.
H Miracle´s last [type] ..H Miracle Scam
I have been exercising and wanting to loose waight for 9 months now. My weight stays EXACTLY where it has been for 9 months. Oh yes, I go down 1-2 kiloes, and then they are right back on again.
It’s frustrating.
The only method that ever worked for me was Weightwatchers – I lost 15 kilos in 12 weeks. But now they are back, and I am thinking whether I should go back, even though that too feels like a failure.
I hope you make it.
Hi Ejvind, sorry to hear about your struggle with weight loss! I still truly believe that we can only achieve permanent weight loss if we really change our eating habits, not go on a diet. Weight Watchers can really help with the adjusting of your eating to smaller portions and different food, but for some the constant counting and keeping track of things makes it hard. I tried Weight Watchers quite a few years back, and I wasn’t even successful with it at all because I found it too much work to look up everything I ate (I know, pathetic). So good on you for losing 15 kilos! Why not go back and do it again, remember: “You only fail once you stop trying”
Its not fair to beat yourself up like that. we all have our ups and downs. And just because you know all the right things to do doesn’t mean that you will always follow them. I unfortunately came down with a stress induced skin disorder that caused me to be on steroids for months. Now that i am not on them I can’t lose the weight. I have never been this big and have no clue what to do about it. I feel bad but we all have times in our life where we need to make minor adjustments, maybe that time is now for you. Its kinda like they say if you do the same exercise regime all the time it won’t work as well as switching up.
Cameron, thanks for being so understanding! Sorry to hear about your skin disorder and having to be on steroids. I have heard that steroids will “blow you up” – a friend of mine had to take them for a while and put on the pounds, too. I wish you all the best!
Yea it did and thanks. They actually have a side affect called Moon Face. I had it and boy it was not fun. My friends got a good laugh at it though. We can’t win all the time!
Thanks for your support and they do blow you up quite a bit. I just read your post on your friends site Mediterranean Diet. I am looking into that to see if it can help me shed a few lbs.!
Whatever we try to do in life there will always be set backs or circumstances that will cause us to change our course of action.in regards to our weight loss plan Sometimes it;s for medical reasons or more happier events like pregnancy. It is how we handle the situation that makes the difference. I believe whatever the circumstances we can still be succesful may’be it will just take a little bit longer than we first anticipated.
weightloss success to all
Rita
Rita from Fat After Baby´s last [type] ..Looking For A Belly Fat Diet To Suit You
Thanks, Rita. I just headed over to your blog and you have some good advice there, too!
Hey, if it wasn’t hard, everyone would be healthy and happy and always productive. We have to work at the things we want, but that ends up making them even more special when we see the results that we want.
Thanks for sharing and by the way there is nothing to be ashamed of because same is the case with most of us. It is very hard to stick to a diet plan and you are bound to go off track every now and than but the key is to get back on track as soon as you can.
Frank´s last [type] ..Does Green Tea Burn Fat
Hey just don’t try to make some harsh rules for yourself which even you can’t follow for losing weight and every thing will be perfectly fine. Don’t force yourself not to eat something which you wanna eat just have it in a bit less quantity and there in a month you can lose almost 3 kgs of your extra weight.
Thanks for putting together these great tips. I have been searching for this wonderful information for a while now. I just have to put some of the tips here in practice and see what the result will be in the next couple of weeks. great post.
Hi Petra,
I know what you’re going through! Not sure if this will help or not, but I used to live in a zen monastery (for 5 years). You can imagine that it’s A LOT of meditation, up to 10 hours a day during intensives. The basic thing people would do is focus on their breath and not allow thoughts to distract them, but thoughts always come in no matter what you do. A lot of people would beat themselves up when they tumbled into hours of thinking while they were sitting on the cushion (me included). After a while I learned that beating myself up was useless because it’s going to happen at times. Instead, I would just take notice of what I was doing and then gently shift back to my focus without chastising myself. I found this works for everything in my life. We are human, there will be times when we fall of the horse, and that is ok too.
I found this approach works for dieting as well, because it’s bound to happen! You just take notice of what happened, let go of it, and go back to your diet. The trick is not beating yourself up over what happened.
When an aircraft carrier wants to turn around and go the opposite direction, it takes about 5 miles to do this before it is going where it wants to go. It’s the same with our habits. We have a thought about where we would like to be, but we are being propelled by our current habits. You have the intention of turning around, and during the process of turning around you will inevitably battle those habits. But turn around you will. It’s inevitable. I hope I made sense!
Wow, to have lived in a Zen Monastery, that is so fantastic! I really appreciate your input, and I think you are absolutely right. If we beat ourselves up over it, it will just lead to more stress and unhappiness. If we accept what has happened and then simply keep going in the right direction it will be much more effective, and less stressful. Thank you so much for such an insightful comment!
In this kind of world, it is easy to understand why overweight people would feel self-conscious about their appearance and bodies. They often feel that the first thing people notice about them is their size, and that can be a depressing reality.
Society judges overweight people, as a whole. Just look at any tabloid. While it may not be fair, celebrities who put on just a few pounds are often ridiculed in the media.
Don’t beat yourself up over this. You are HUMAN! There’s no perfect person, and there’s no way to totally control everything that happens or how you handle it. I’ve been working on my own weight-loss issues on and off all my life and I’ve messed up TONS of times. Luckily right now I’m on the right path, but I have to remind myself daily that I can’t get off that path or it will be so hard to get back on. It’s a daily struggle. And I just started! lol Good luck! I know you’ll gain control again soon!
Christy
Christy@HCG Diet´s last [type] ..VLCD 16 R2
Don’t be discouraged! I completely agree there is a distinct difference between knowing the right things to do…and doing the right things. That being said, knowing is the first step! You are on your way. Just work on applying once concept a week. Stick to it. Once it becomes a part of your lifestyle then adopt another change.
Trying to change too much too quickly will lead to capitulation and no change at all. Slow and steady wins the race! You can do it!
Hi Petra…
I know you may have heard this before. But 1 thing to remember; IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT! Don’t beat yourself up. Some might say it’s easy for me to say. Well, I used to have that yo-yo weight gain during my whole teen & your adulthood. For the past 4 years I’m not the token fat guy anymore, I’m immune from any guilt, as long as i don’t reach that ‘red light’ level.
It’s okay for you to help people even though you have trouble. It’s in fact GREAT; nothing to be ashamed of. Yes, we look up to you, but we realize you’re mortal to. We’re never perfect, since perfection is the essence of God. You maybe the one we look up to, and I’m a reader, to have my own readership, but we’re in this together, as a community with passion (weight loss). We, as this community, should have each other’s back.
Anyway, what works for me: eating as natural as possible (according to my budget, that is), do super ninja research about cheap organic in the place I’m in, ‘focus’ on my eating (enjoy every bite of it, chewing ‘em passionately) and never watch TV or do other things, check BMR every 4 weeks, diversify my weight training, do HIIT & Tabata, train self defense.
Good news, you don’t have to try everything. 50% plan is better than nothing, right. Do what you love, Petra! (I don’t want people to force me to PCD aerobics when I’m an MMA guy :p).
We’re in this together, Petra
Best wishes
Thank you so much for your support! Nice to know that people don’t turn away from reading my blog, or stop liking my advice on weight loss. You are right, I am as mortal as everybody else, and this time I have fallen off the wagon. – But I will be back!
You are not alone. It is not an easy process and I have fallen off the “wagon” many times. I finally stopped the diets and just took out my frustration by pumping iron. That is what had worked for me. I forgot about my food and just worked out as hard as I could and keep a schedule of 1 hour per day 3 days a week. I lost 50 pounds in 4 months and keeping it off. The stress is gone too! Here is how I did it: http://bit.ly/91T5IU
my weight is 75kg. according to my height my weight should be around 55kgs. MAN i need to reduce 20kgs!!! but my weight didnt increase after that for years now….but the things is that of loosing up the consumed one..:( i also know the ways of reducing weight….but!!!!!! so now after reading your views….have decided to loosen up……thanks…:)
I think the most important thing is to not give up! Just because you had a little setback doesn’t mean you’re totally off-track. I definitely overeat sometimes, and I tend to have an all-or-nothing personality… so if I go out for fast food or eat a big bowl of ice cream, then I feel like that day is ruined so I might as well keeping eating junk food. It’s a terrible cycle! Just don’t beat yourself up. That never helps the situation!
It might take a week or two before you notice any changes, but they will steadily appear. Just stay firm on your point that you want top lose weight. Atleast those 3kgs which you gained.
Hi Petra. Don’t be too hush with yourself. Most of us facing the same problem. I believe you can reduce your weight within one or two month by doing some extra exercise and using some easy diet. I strongly believe you will success if you put some adjustment on your daily routine.
zack@purple heart car donation´s last [type] ..Car Donations -The Top 5 Tips
Thanks, Zack, for believing in me!
I admire the author for being honest. Kudos to her for being brave enough to post this despite the fact that she’s been an expert adviser about proper diet.
For me, there’s nothing wrong in gaining weight as long you are happy with it. And I know if you really wanted to loose then you can perfectly do it because you are knowledgeable enough. Just enjoy, don’t take tension about it. It’s just 3kg. It is not half of your life.
charlotte´s last [type] ..How to Do the Master Cleanse Fast
Emotional overeating is primarily eating to mask difficult feelings.To be your very best, naturally healthy, vibrant, beautiful self and to stop eating for emotional reasons, you must consider your total well being.Remember that this is your life and your body to do with as you wish. It doesn’t matter what anyone else is doing, thinking about or telling you. To be happy, healthy and whole is up to you.
Michael, beautifully put, and so true. Thanks!
If you don’t deal with it right now you’ll never stop overeating and will always have out-of-control cravings.The most common mistake when it comes to losing weight that not only keeps you fat but is also the cause of eating disorders. Without avoiding this mistake you can never lose weight and keep it off.To get in shape I decided to join a group exercise class at
my last gym.I know it is hard, but keep trying.
It’s fine, at least you notice the changes now and you can act on it immediately. Maybe you could make use of all your advices, then make yourself as a proof that everything you say is reliable to all your readers/followers.
Cole Stan´s last [type] ..Birthday Gifts for Dad- You Can’t Go Wrong with These 3 Great Birthday Gifts for Dads
Cole Stan, that would be wonderful if I could do that!
Like other people have said, you shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. You can have all the knowledge in the world but sometimes things get in the way and stop your from being able to practice what you know.
Marc@Slimming Pills´s last [type] ..Is it possible to lose weight for the wrong reasons
Just eat a bit less than your usual diet and you’ll be perfectly fine.
This a some great information for people that is thinking about dieting and living a healthier lifestyle. I was just reading this other great article like yours and was wondering if you read this blog? If you have what do think about the article Healthy Eating Menu
Your article is very useful to read keep it up…
Amy´s last [type] ..The Way To Healthy Eating
Hi Amy, I just hopped over to your blog and can see that you are a fan of Isabel De Los Rios’s The Diet Solution Program, too. I think her program is one of the really good ones, one that you can pursue for life without too much trouble, and where you can see good results.
This is my first time i visit here. I found so many interesting stuff in your blog, especially its discussion. From the tons of comments on your posts, I guess I am not the only one having all the leisure here! Keep up the good work.
As the Other posters say, don’t worry. its always easier to give advice than to do it your self. Perhaps you should get into a daily routine. I don’t keep any rubbish food in the house which seems to help.
I think in way that you are right, but just don´t take all that pressure upon your shoulder. We know that is important to keep watching every single thing that we eat. Maybe there is something on our emotions, that manage ourselves to eat more and more. On the mornings, wake up, try to have a plate of fruits, that will not let you get weight, try to have a walk about 30 minutes before eating your breakfast; and after all that try spend must of the time working on something, or occupied. Have a nice lunch, and eat less on the dinner but before 6 pm..so you could the time to make a good digestion. Oh yeah, drink a lot of water.
Oliver, that is actually exactly what I am trying to do, just that I get these emotional binges in between, especially after 6pm, at the worst possible time.
The battle of losing weight is tough. Heck, been battling my whole life. Forward, backward, forward, backward.
The key is consistency and perseverance. You already see where you are weak, just need to keep working at it! It appears there is great support here, just keep your head up and keep going.
Blessings,
Ron
The most important thing is not give up, don’t loose your hopes in your weight loss struggle. Most people fail to achieve their goal of losing weight because they lack confidence or don’t make up their mind the way they should. So always think healthy and choose the best guide to burn the fat feed the muscle.
burn the fat feed the muscle´s last [type] ..Burn the fat feed the muscle Review – Discover Why My Story Will Shock You!
Hi Petra, many thanks for sharing this inspirational post with us. Personally I’ve come to realize that persistence is very important in every aspects of our pursuit. If we persist and don’t loose heart easily then we’ll succeed.
Tamara @ kids leia costume´s last [type] ..WordPress Confusion
Oh … how well I understand you! I also have the same problem. I started my own weight loss project in the internet, I every day read tips, articles, and many other things about weight losing, and so on …
And what did I get while doing all that … I did get extra weight! From one side, it is even sadly, because before I started my last project, I have lost some 10 pounds, and now I did get halve back.
I know that I will start all that again, and I will lose that what I gain back, but still it disappoints me as a fact.
Mary, I really understand you, too! We know everything to lose the weight. But our emotions play tricks with us.
Hi Petra,
when I started my blog, I started with writing posts, articles and making videos on “how to stop cravings” – and believe it or not – by the end of that month I was back eating sweets like I had in my worst times!
No wonder, all I was thinking about was cravings, cravings, cravings! I guess my brain didn’t notice the “stop” before the cravings
So, maybe on our diet blogs we should rather start talking about SLIMMING down instead of losing WEIGHT ?
Take care, Claudia
Claudia@dietmotivation´s last [type] ..Use Dog Food to Lose Weight!
You have a point there, Claudia! The more we think about losing weight and eating less, the more we crave food as we think about it all the time! Maybe we should just ease up and try to be less stressed about it, and less stressed in general. I believe that’s part of what’s needed to “slim down” the natural way.
That is so true, stress is a big contributor to hindering weight loss.
I like this method to reduce stress (free mp3 download):
http://www.zpointforpeace.com/zPoint_Process.shtml
I also use it in my course to reduce cravings and a modified version to get the unconscious mind to help with weight loss.
But try Grant Connolly’s ZPoint process for stress relieve, it’s really awesome!
Claudia@dietmotivation´s last [type] ..Darth Vader of the Weight Loss Universe
Don’t feel too bad. This happens to a great deal of people. Just take a step back, reevaluate everything and go back in it with a clear head! You’ll reach your goal when you’re meant to reach it.
The Diet Solution Review´s last [type] ..Foods To Lose Weight
Hi Petra Cheer up! That’s why it is very important to practice what you preach. LOL. Of course I want to lighten the load you bear. Smile. Life was not perfect as the way we want it to be and so was you. I also practice these for several times so you are never alone. I advise my friends the right way to lose weight but me, myself can’t follow it either.
I’m having the same problem. I weigh over 100 kilos and I can’t do anything right so that I lose at least 10 kilos. It can be overwhelming, especially when all family is expecting you to do better than that.
We are not perfect and it’s okay to crave for foods that we love to it, only that we should learn how to control it. Base on my own experience, there where times when I really can’t control myself from eating foods that I wanted. But soon after I gained knowledge and ideas from different magazines and blog, dieting for me is not that hard at all. Jogging regularly and avoiding high carbo foods is my secret.